Meet Amy: From High-Performer to Purpose-Driven Pause — Letting Go of Urgency Culture to Build Something New

Before having children, Amy worked as an executive recruiter in Charlotte, North Carolina — helping companies hire talent into their accounting and finance teams while juggling business development through networking events, client lunches, and constant connection.

But beneath the success was deep personal loss.

“My dad passed away unexpectedly in January 2022, and I found out flying back from my company’s annual rewards trip. My dad was in his early 60s.”

That same year, Amy hit her highest sales numbers yet.

“It was a mix of a great economy but also I was in overdrive to perform, make my dad proud in a way, and grieved the best I could — but 100% buried myself in work because I thought I had something to prove. My dad put a lot of emphasis on career, making a good salary, etc. (external markers).”

In 2023, Amy became pregnant with her first child, and by March 2024, her son was born — another massive shift in an already transforming world.

“Coming back from maternity leave felt like I had to ‘start over’ after 6+ years.”

Between new motherhood, unresolved grief, and the unraveling of perfectionism, Amy began to question if she could keep doing what she had always done.

“The motherhood journey, along with grief and largely my own healing journey with trauma — being a ‘performer/perfectionist’ — led me to go part-time. Or really, ask if that was possible.”

She’s grateful for how her team responded.

“My boss and leadership were super accommodating and willing to flex for me to work hourly & go part time.”

But then came another loss — one that reshaped everything.

“My father-in-law, in September of this year, passed away from cancer. It brought back grief from my dad along with supporting my spouse who lost both of his parents, while caring for a child, grieving myself, and feeling a pull to exit urgency culture.”

That’s when Amy made the decision to fully leave her corporate job of 8 years.

“I will be resting, recalibrating, and working on a coaching program for female leaders and moms — with nervous system regulation and how we can sustain ourselves during seasons of stress, performance, and pressure.”

Challenges Along the Way

Letting go of performance-driven identity wasn't easy.

“Emotionally, a lot! With being OK resting, and not having the next chapter figured out. Some of my identity was tied to performing, making money, contributing financially — so that has played a part as well.”

What I Wish I’d Known

“That you need to listen to your body, heart, and mind. I got to a point where for over a year my body was giving me subtle hints that it was time to make this move. High cortisol being one of them — but also feeling lighter after the decision.”

Resources That Helped

“The Power Pause, that community, as well as my supportive spouse.”

Advice to Others

“To listen to your body and your heart. And to ask questions. If I didn’t ask to go part time I might not have come to this ultimate conclusion of quitting all together.”

“Of course there is the budgeting and logistically making sure certain transitions can happen — but really listening and being OK going against the grain… and to find communities like Both& where you have options.”

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